The Narrative of Kurt & Becky

When it came time for me to buy Peter his SWIM diapers, I noticed that some boxes had a coupon for $1 off. Okay, so they were the Dora the Explorer branded variety. I knew that, I went for the dollar off (aka the cheap-out). When I got home and opened the box I saw that there were free sunglasses included and they are pink and have Dora on them. “Okay so he already has stylish ‘boy’ ones, these will be fun as a toy,” I thought. I handed them to him directly and he loved them – He even let me put them on his face (albeit for about 2 seconds).

Here is evidence.

note: Peter, please forgive me if this is embarrassing at any point. You are just very cute.

We may or may not have put this on him. Okay we did it. I’ve been really into the Celebrity Apprentice this time around and Kurt and I were inspired.

May I present, Baby Bret Michaels…

note: it is blurry because Peter was not a fan.
also note: best wishes to Bret on a speedy recovery from his recent medical concerns.

Here is Peter’s new facial expression. I contend it has something to do with teething. Maybe not though.

Yeah disregard that one. So the fever came back and got worse.
Friday morning, I took him to our pediatrician and he took a urine sample. It was a Urinary Tract Infection. The pediatrician gave him an antibiotic shot in the leg. He said that would do it. It did not. The urologist wanted us to come to the Emergency Department at UCLA. So we went. His temperature was 103.8 upon admission to the Emergency Department. Our doctor met us right away there in the Emergency Department. They did an x-ray, ultrasound, blood work, gave him an IV and a Foley catheter. The infection had gotten to his kidney. It was so key to treat the infection quickly because his fever was so high for so long and he was in horrendous pain. They tried one type of antibiotic and it didn’t work. We spent the night on Friday in the Emergency Department. We all three slept on the gurney. It was pretty brutal. Peter was burning up and in great pain.

Saturday morning around 10am we got a room upstairs. They tried a second type of antibiotic on Saturday which did work. His fever was gone by late night on Saturday into Sunday morning. Whew, a sigh of relief. The fever was gone, the pain was going away, but not gone. He had pain from the catheter and from the IV. The IV was installed in the elbow crook and it wasn’t taped correctly so it hurt him and the IV pump kept alarming with ‘downstream occlusion.’ We told the nurse that it needed to be fixed and she wrapped it so he couldn’t bend it. When they finally removed it moments before we left, we discovered that it was pressing so hard the there were 3 rows of cuts on his arm. Poor guy, that looked pretty bad. From Sunday morning until Monday morning, he felt so much better that we were all three able to relax a bit. It had been so stressful the previous 3 days that the relief was very welcome to us all. We slept better (meaning at all) on Sunday night, hoping and praying the while time that we’d be able to go home on Monday. God heard our prayers because we were home by noon on Monday. We were so glad Peter was well and just looking back on it all – grateful for the doctors we have and the modern drugs that saved his life.

Here is Peter’s sweet face on the way home. (Melts me every time.)

Here are my guys when we got home. Ahh, home!

We had a bit of a scare yesterday. Peter had a fever. I called the doctor. He said to bring him to the ER at UCLA immediately. So Kurt came home and we went up there. The medical professional said, okay, its not related to surgery/his kidneys it is just teething. So we went and enjoyed LA by visiting The Grove. It was certainly not what either of us planned to do yesterday. I cannot explain the WORRY that overtook me. Let’s just say, as a parent of a baby with a health problem where a simple fever could mean permanent damage to his organs, yeah, I was scared. Thank God it was nothing. Thank God we were able to get there quickly and find out everything was okay. Then thank God we were able to “cool off” by exploring something fun.
Speaking of teething, he has two teeth and didn’t sleep much last night. This ought to be an interesting Friday.

First things first… I firmly believe that there should NOT be any reason for a child to need to go to the hospital. If I were in charge, I would change that one immediately. Sadly, I am not in charge and children and babies do, in fact, get sick and even some need surgery.

Now then, my baby is one of those who had a health concern and needed surgery. (I am realizing that it feels do good to use the words “had” and “needed” because it means it is all past tense.)
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Time to lighten up a bit. Here are some fun items of interest!

1. HB Farmer Market Strawberries. I love strawberries. These are organic….you can tell because they all look misshapen (like butts).

2. Here is Peter and his new dog. They love each other.

3. Here is a picture that Sally drew of Peter and his dog. Too cute.

4. Somebody figured out how to work the sippy cup. (blurry photo, makes it more exciting! N’est pas?)

5. Signing a bill with 20 pens must be REALLY difficult. A task that is sure to require the level of signature practice of a girl in love.

6. 1st shoulder ride. Kurt is TALL. Peter is TALL. This may prove to be impossible later on. Hair reigns made Peter laugh… Daddy, notsomuch (ouchie).

7. Concentration. Walking with help. New Shoes.

8. Ankle crossing – this is his thing. He’s always done it. It is really cute.

9. Eastertime Care Package from my pals. The items are clever but it is the friendships that are very meaningful to me.

10. THREE.

There’s a story here and a lesson to be learned.

Recently, I tried to engage in a relationship with another half-sister on facebook. (We live far apart and facebook would be the only means of relationship. Especially since my dad died.) That attempt ended yesterday following a very hurtful exchange directed to me (and my Mom and brother). Her message to me was purely based on her resentment/bitterness/jealousy from 40 years ago and her false beliefs about me and my family. The exchange started when she made a status update linking to an article about Christians. I responded with good intentions in truth and love by saying that just because we attend church doesn’t make us perfect people…but that’s not the point. Well, that led to her asking what Dad would have thought about the subject and then she spiraled out of control into all of these judgments and accusations about things that happened 40 years ago. Without stating any specifics, she was hurtful and venomous. She made claims and statements that were horrible. I did not respond to that message – I couldn’t because I was overwhelmed.

After praying about it and discussing it with my support system I made the choice to “unfriend” her on facebook. Only, when I went to do so, she had already “unfriended” me.

After thinking about this over and again, I read my Bible: Matthew 5 and Psalm 139.

The link she posted (about Christians) is exactly what this is all about. NEWSFLASH: I am not perfect, nobody is! But I have a relationship with the God of the universe. He created me, he loves me and he offers me GRACE. I stood up for Christianity to her on facebook. We are called as Christians to be “light” and “salt.” If I had kept my mouth shut this probably wouldn’t have happened; I would have a shallow meaningless relationship with a “sister” who secretly hates my existence and I would have walked away from an opportunity to witness to her (while sharing my faith). I am at peace with this because it is out of my hands.

SIDE NOTE ON DIVORCE: It can wreck children’s lives. It can wreck people’s hearts. One thing is for sure, it always hurts. It leaves indelible scars on your heart. BUT there is hope. God is a restorer, a healer and HE can make you new. I truly believe that. Christianity aside, (because some people who read this may tune out at the Christian stuff – I hope you don’t though) if you have this type of hurt in your life, you need to seek professional therapy. The pain of divorce can be unbearable without help. Going without professional help can make a bad situation (divorce, Maybe it isn’t actual divorce but abandonment of some kind) even worse (addiction, repetition of pattern, depression, etc). You are worthwhile, ask for help.

SIDE NOTE ON CHURCHGOERS AND HATE: If you are a Christian who hates, please be aware that people are watching. They don’t understand God’s grace and they are completely off-put by you as a representative of Christ. You might need to look at it hard and make some revisions. Whether the issue is gay marriage, the President, immigration, any “hot-button” issue, we really need to treat others how Christ would treat them. Let’s not be legalistic and judging – that’s not our place ultimately. Love your neighbor, that’s what we need to do.

I’ve been thinking about character often lately. Let’s start with the definition. That’s usually a good jumping off point.

Merriam Webster defines it as:  -one of the attributes or features that make up and distinguish an individual -the complex of mental and ethical traits marking and often individualizing a person, group, or nation -main or essential nature especially as strongly marked and serving to distinguish -moral excellence and firmness

According to CharacterCounts.org there are Six Pillars of Character – Trustworthiness, Respect, Responsibility, Fairness, Caring, Citizenship.

As a Christian, I’ve heard the term “the character of Christ” spoken often. He pretty much had the most righteous character of all time.

What about my character? What about yours?

Why is it that character is built into children, purposefully by parents, schoolteachers, churches but it just has to HAPPEN to adults?

For example, as a child everyone is trying to instill in you those six pillars (Trustworthiness, Respect, Responsibility, Fairness, Caring, Citizenship). Children are taught lessons on the values of those things. They are faced with the consequences of not being a good citizen or not being respectful.

Adults are often times the ones who need these lessons. For example, people in the service industry should be treated with respect and fairness. Just because hey are a waiter or a cashier does not entitle one to be a jerk to them. AND The other drivers on the road are people with live and families; they are not just cars with faceless drivers.  People sometimes are in such a hurry in lines that they do not consider anyone else but their own needs or desires. They cheat in the express lane or cut in line in front of you. I’m sure we could all think of a million different peeves or problems where a dose of integrity and respect would be helpful.

I certainly know I am guilty of showing the a lack of character sometimes. As a Christian, I am called to distinguish myself by displaying attributes of mental/ethical traits with moral excellence and firmness. What I mean to say is. Christians are called to be different. NOT to be PERFECT. That’s impossible. I will never be perfect. We will fail to even TRY to be perfect.

What I will do: Not put myself first. Treat others how I would want to be treated. Build my character myself rather than letting it just happen to me.

“You cannot dream yourself into a character; you must hammer and forge yourself one.” -Henry David Thoreau

I encourage you to think about your character. How can you develop yours? Not sure? Well pick an area and go for it.

Just a few items below will update you on us. Enjoy.

~Effective 7 March 2010, Peter is 8 months old. Wow. He’s done so much in the past 8 months. He is a few months away from being 1 year old. But the next few months bring new challenges, exciting milestones and just plain baby stuff.

~Lately, Peter and I have done lotsa walking. I am eating right (meaning, no sweets). I did HAVE TO have a Shamrock shake the other night though. I had a small one though and I savored it because I won’t have another shake for quite a while. Believe me, I di not want to go to McDonalds, neither did Kurt. But we had to. The Shamrock shake beckoned us.

~Kurt and Peter have gotten some baby & Daddy time on the the evenings when I go to Hoag to work. I think it is great for them both and for me. It affects each of us in different ways but it all winds up being good for us all.

~Kurt and I gave Peter an AWFUL gift for turning 8 months old…… a COLD. His very first illness. It was (and still is) horrible to see him sick. I hate it. His rosy cheeks are pretty cute but I’d prefer my healthy baby. Oh and he makes this weird squeaky noise on demand with his nose/throat that is pretty awesome. Baby sneezes are cute too; but the snot that accompanies the sneeze is not.

~We’ve scheduled the surgery for Peter. I don’t really want to say when or where because this is the internet. (Stranger danger! But let me just say: It is before he turns 12 months.) I’ll mention this on facebook as the time gets closer so true friends can have more details.

Please pray for peace of mind for us until then. While we are glad to have this “end in sight” (for one of the kidneys) we are scared because of the grand scheme of it all.  Nobody wants to hand their baby over for surgery. Heck, I’ve never even had surgery (not counting my wisdom teeth extraction). I will fully admit that this is scary. At the same time, fear is a terrible time waster. I’ve seen it ravage people’s lives. I will not stand for that. God — He is higher than us all and even higher than emotions or fear or anything else. Kim and Teona recently said that there are things that you cannot determine whether they are good or bad while you are “in” it. This was a conversation about the book “The Shack.” Sometimes the situation seems bad but it turns out to be a step in the direction of good. Only God can do that – turn bad into good. Perfect example, My Mom had to hand her little baby boy off to a surgeon more than once. So she can big time understand. So we’ll trust in Him – that there is good from this in the long-run.

~I am playing uh, 8 people on words with friends right now. It is hard. I am not winning many of the matches.

~I am working on the photo archive project still. I’m getting closer to being caught up like we’re talking I am to August 2009.

~Kurt and I are doing a little ancestry project too. That is pretty fun. Interesting information. More to come on that.

Edited to add:

~bought a new car. 2007 Honda Accord Hybrid